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| dirty memories beautiful |
Aug 26, 2011
Aug 10, 2011
Everywhere I went people called me a witch my doctor said I must have been a witch in my previous life I had a hard time believing in previous lives because I didn’t remember any they said it was my hair that was so dangerous I cut it short then my eyes became dangerous so I stopped looking at people then people talked about my voice so I left I was in a foreign lover's bed when the strange high fever took over my body for two weeks I moaned I took an airplane and came home alone where I slept for a year my right lung was infected with tuberculosis my voice was gone I didn’t talk I didn’t look for a year when I opened my eyes again my voice returned to my body not in the same tune as before my father cried how I looked and sounded different to him I was ruined I never understood why he had to dwell on my past I never cared for virginity or beauty or purity I liked being destroyed so that I could be reborn Dad, please don’t cry I died many times before and I was reborn many times
Jul 30, 2011
dear sasha i've been thinking of you a lot lately if you see this write me when i was driving to new mexico i was feeling overwhelmed by the never ending crazy nature and its heavy energy breathing dense on me i felt it wanting to rape me badly i didn't comprehend it i decided i wanted to rape it and drive as fast as possible instead of being raped by it i never felt so alone before there was nobody nothing for three hours i started crying in the car i called your name a few times
Jul 29, 2011
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